Oh where, oh where has my mojo gone....

This says it all. I have always been and will always be a princess......one of the Italian variety (thank you very much) but being a princess does not mean that we are immune from losing our mojo.

For weeks....even months, I ate well, journaled my food and activity. I exercised almost everyday and added long walks with my sassy girl. I was feeling great. Even through losing my dad in March I still plugged along. It was a tribute to him. I am embarrassed and ashamed to say that my tribute to him is going nowhere fast. I had lost my momentum.....my will to fight the good fight.

First I skipped a meeting, then two......which then allowed me to stop tracking my food. If I was not going to face the scale I had time to get it under control, right? Which lead to me stop my nightly walk with sassy. I used the excuse that all the mulch was making her allergies worse (that part is the truth......but I could have done something else or gone without her). The other day I realized I had missed 6 or 7 meetings, had not tracked a bite and with a bad summer cold I had not exercised much. WHAT THE HECK WAS I DOING?

I took this opportunity to set myself straight. Avoiding the issue was not going to make it better AND IT DID NOT MAKE ME A FAILURE. It is the second part of the statement I could not face. I was failing myself, my promise to my dad, myself.....yes I said me twice. need to do this for me. I am tired of being overweight. I am tired of allowing excuses to rule me. I needed to chat with myself and pick myself up, get dusted off and start all over again.

I opened my iPhone app and started by tracking my food for a couple of days......it was easy! Whooda thunk! I woke up early yesterday and made it to my meeting. I faced the scale and all my ghosts and demons. I could not blame the scale for my lack of work and effort. I hear people say all the time 'the scale was/was not my friend'. The scale is an inanimate object....can't do anything except record my activity. Sort of like a computer....it is only as accurate and good as the operator.

Being freshly dusted off, I successfully journaled every BLT (bite, lick, taste) and even went to a birthday party. It was not hard......saying it is hard is in my head. It is my demons making me afraid. What do I have to be afraid of? Success? Sounds silly, eh?

I am moving forward. I feel like I found my mojo....we are having a chat about how we can continue to work together. I am relaxed right now......letting mojo lead the way. I know what to do and how to do it. Now to stop being afraid of success....