Life has been crazy but I have the choice of falling for the crap and wallowing in it or going in a different, sometimes more difficult but fulfilling , path. All choices...
It has always been a struggle for me to keep a pristine house. It is not me.....it is my mother. She is a great house keeper. Everything is always put away. I have tried......truly. The last time my mother was here she commented on how I did not keep house.....I told her I keep house, just not like she does. My lesson: Hire a cleaning lady! Angie is a keeper, and I don't have to stress about having a messy place. I have been purging and I do have stuff to put away before she gets here. I now keep the kitchen table clean all the time. Mail is sorted daily and taken care of. It feel freeing. I do what feels like the easy stuff and I don't stress about it anymore. Angie does a much better job than I did because all I did was resent having to do it!!
Eating well has always been a challenge for me. I, for the most part, do a good job. I am lucky that I love fresh fruits and veggies. I struggle with portion control. I need to stop being resentful of eating healthy. It does not happen often but when those voices in my head (appropriately named DEVIL WOMAN) encourage me to eat something else, a little more, a smidge of this.....she does not have my well being. She has all my negativity and insecurity. My lesson: Keep these times at a minimum. When DW gets loud, I am learning more to tell her shut the hell up! I am so worth everything I do for myself and I DO have my best interest at heart. When they do happen, forgive it and move on. I can't change what I just did but I can move forward in a better attitude and state of being.
Walking with my head up high is NOT something I do. I am always looking at the ground like I don't want to make eye contact. In my defense (just a little) I have no depth perception so I think of it as guiding myself. I am practicing walking with my head held high, shoulders back, walking with purpose (even if it is just laps around the lab). My lesson: Walking with my head up I am not missing out on the beautiful scenery. I am not missing seeing people smiling and laughing. I am not missing so many things. Just remember, no laughing if I trip because I did not see the crack in the sidewalk! LOL!Well, this is all I have for now. There will be future installments of Lessons I have Learned!
